Although a great deal of emphasis is placed on activities with the parent when the caseworker is preparing to reunify the family, this is an important time for the child and foster parent/relative caregiver as well. The caseworker needs to spend time with the child to prepare him/her for return home. The caseworker should inform the child of the targeted date for return home while being aware of the child's cognitive ability and ability to understand what this means. Explain to the child that his/her parents are working to have the child return by the target date, but that sometimes things happen that may change that date. Anticipate that if the return home date is revised, the child may be disappointed and angry. Although the child may want to return home, it represents a change and therefore creates uncertainty, anxiety, and ambivalence. The caseworker, parent, caregiver and service provider (if there is one) must work together in helping the child sort through these feelings and make a smooth transition home. It will be important for these adults to present a "united front" so the child's conflicting feelings are not exacerbated.
These adults must begin clear, age-appropriate discussions with the child about the plans for return home, what the child could expect, assisting the child to identify those persons whom he/she can call upon (if old enough) if he/she needs help, where he/she will be attending school and other important facts. The child must be given the opportunity to respond and work through feelings of separation from, and loss of, the foster parent/relative caregiver, school and neighborhood friends, teachers, and other significant others. A tool that may be helpful in this process is the child's Lifebook. Assisting the child to update the Lifebook, asking caregiver, friends and others to give the child photos or other reminders to take with him/her and other activities around the Lifebook may facilitate the child's resolution of his/her feelings. In addition, the caregiver should make a list of the child's daily activities and routines and other relevant information for the birth parents to smooth the child's transition home.